13 Shocking Things I Wish I Knew Before My Child Started Kindergarten

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There are a few things I wish I knew before my child started kindergarten to help me be more prepared as a parent!

Hi friends,

When our children start Kindergarten we have a million things running through our head! We worry if they know everything they need to know, if they have all the supplies they need, etc.

One thing we don’t often think about is.. ourselves. Are we prepared?

Your little one is going through a huge change and taking a big step but honestly, so are we! This is huge for us too. There are a few things I wasn’t prepared for or had even thought of when my child started Kindergarten.

If your little one is about to head into kindergarten this fall, this is for you! Here are 14 things I wish I knew before my child started Kindergarten!

14 Things I wish I knew Before My Child Started Kindergarten

1. The first day will likely be harder on you than them

Like most parents, I was so incredibly worried about sending my daughter into the great unknown.

That first day of Kindergarten is so nerve wracking but truth be told, it’s probably mostly all in your head.

I thought for sure my daughter would shed a few tears or be nervous but nope, she walked right through those doors like it was nothing. I had to call out her name to even get a final goodbye wave. Talk about heart wrenching lol

Truth is, you’ve been preparing for them for this their whole life so far. You’ve made them a strong, independent, kind and resourceful child! Be proud of that and have faith in it.

If you’re truly worried, there are a few things you can do to help calm their nerves and make the first day go super smooth. First, read tons of books about Kindergarten to get them familiar with and excited for what’s ahead. Don’t miss meet the teacher night, use our meet the teacher night tips to truly make the most of that important night. Also, involve them “back to school” shopping and allow them to pick their own supplies.

Lastly, consider having a first day comfort ritual. Some people do “jitter glitter” where you sprinkle glitter over their heads as pixie dust of sorts. There are also mommy and me back to school bracelets you can either make or buy. You keep one with you and your child wears theirs so that you’re both reminded of each other all day.

Back To School Bracelet

2. How to get on the teachers good side

Teachers are obviously so important and being on good terms with them help the year go by so much easier.

You don’t need to be a room mom or even join the PTA to be an active parent in the school! Get to know your child’s teacher and be a parent they’re always happy to talk to and who they know they can count on.

Offer to volunteer whenever you can. This can include chaperoning on field trips, helping with class parties or even just always bringing in extra basic needed supplies like tissues in the winter. Be thoughtful and helpful wherever you can be.

Personally, my daughters school counted on either the teacher or parents to provide afternoon snack. I knew I never wanted her teacher to have to pay out of pocket for that so I always made to sure to bring in snacks just about every month. If she ever sent home a papers to parents about needing more snacks I would always hit up Sams club the next day.

Another way? Gifts. Never miss an opportunity show your appreciation for everything they do! There are so many gift giving holidays throughout the year and we make sure we take advantage of each and every one.

If you struggle with gift ideas, same. Luckily, our teachers passed out “about the teacher” papers on the first day. It gave us a brief idea of who they were and what they liked. If your child’s teacher doesn’t give you something like this, we actually have a “my teachers favorite things” printable questionnaire you can send in to them. It’s super quick and will give you tons of gift ideas for the school year!

3. Don’t be afraid to reach out

This is a big thing I wish I knew before my child started Kindergarten!

I’m a huge shy, worry-wart, introvert. Like, big time! I’m always afraid of annoying people and being seen as “that parent” that they dread needing to talk to. If you’re the same, this one is for you!

As parents, we always need to be proactive and ready to speak up for our kids. Don’t be shy if there’s something worrying you. Politely reach out and go into things with an open mind. Don’t be accusatory but still be willing to be firm when needed.

At the same time, we don’t want to run to the teacher every time we have a minor issue come up. Talk things out with your child first and give them the tools they need to navigate a situation. The last thing we want is a mom who cried wolf situation on our hands. If things persist, then by all means speak up, momma bear!

I truly believe my second point on this list will help you. The teacher will know you better and be able to see that you’re an understanding mom who isn’t here to nit pick but to be an advocate for your child when you really need to be.

4. Bullying starts earlier these days

Here’s one of the big things I wish I knew before my child started kindergarten because boy, I was not prepared for this. At all.

When I was in Kindergarten I remember being friends with everyone. The entire classroom was a giant group of friends. We were all only five and six year old for goodness sake!

Well, maybe it’s just a difference in schools but things have certainly seemed to have changed.

I thought for sure I wouldn’t have to worry about bullying until 3rd or 4th grade but I was wrong. It’s heartbreaking when your little one suddenly starts worrying about something about themselves that they’ve never seemed to have even thought about before. Or when they come home holding back tears from their first hard day. It’s a kind of hurt you won’t truly understand until it happens to your child. Truly gut wrenching and I couldn’t believe it’s happening so young.

My advice for this is to allow your child mental health days. Yes, even in Kindergarten. Keep an open line of communication with your child. Regularly check in with them. Be a complete safe zone for them. Watch for sudden changes in their demeanor or overall attitude towards school and other things they would otherwise normally enjoy. Lastly, trust your mom gut and dig deeper into a situation when you feel you need to.

5. Don’t stress over Kindergarten readiness

Have you seen those “one million things your child should know before kindergarten” posts? Those stressed me out so much!

My daughter had only ever stayed home with me before kindergarten. Never been to daycare. Didn’t go to preschool either. I did the normal educational things like puzzles and signing ABC’s but I wouldn’t consider myself a teacher by any means.

At the beginning of the year they have your child take a readiness test. My heart low-key sunk when I got my child’s scores back. Most were on the low end of average but some even fell below average. She could do some things but certainly not all of the things expected of her. I worried that she would be playing catch up all year to her classmates who had attended preschool or had super educational parents.

I’ve talked to so many mommas who had had the same worries and then realized it was all for nothing too. The whole point of kindergarten to lay basic foundations. They’ll be just fine. Looking back, I wish I didn’t beat myself up over it so much. My daughter, like most children, ended up doing extremely well and thriving. Come winter testing she was already scoring above average in several areas. By the end of the school year she had even come home with a notice of being wanted in their gifted program!

I can honestly say, don’t stress over it. Let your child grow and learn at their own pace. Trust in your child’s teacher. They will voice concern if and when they have any. Just remember, this is kindergarten – not college!

6. Birthday favors are a thing

This was such an odd unexpected thing I had never heard of or seen before.

My daughter started randomly coming home with little treat bags and party favors of sorts. She would tell me “oh yeah, so and so had a birthday today! They passed these out to the whole class!”

At first I was thought she meant the teacher handed out mini gifts or something to celebrate but nope. Parents were sending in birthday favors for the class for their child’s birthday. This was news to me!

Luckily, I love any reason to celebrate and make cute little things. In November we jumped to it and made our own playdough cupcake kits for everyone. So unexpected but also very fun!

If you’re not so good at coming up with cute ideas that aren’t just candy, be sure to check out our non-candy birthday favor ideas for school for some quick inspiration!

7. There will be tons of parties

Another thing I wish I knew before my child started kindergarten was that there will be… SO many parties!

I feel like just about every single month they had some sort of celebration going on. Testing week celebration, Halloween party, Thanksgiving feast, winter holiday party, valentines, St. Patrick’s day, Read across America day (Dr. Seuss day), pajama party, field day party, etc. I mean the list goes on and on.

To be honest, this probably ended up being my favorite part of being a Kindergarten mom.

Be ready though, you’ll constantly be asked to bring in certain items for said parties. There will also be plenty of opportunities to join in!

8. They will get sick.. a lot

Man, oh man is Kindergarten just a breeding ground for bacteria?

I knew there would be a few extra germs hanging around but wow! I feel like we were constantly sick pretty much all year. Even worse if you have other kids in the home. Yikes, they just kept passing things back and forth to each other!

Be prepared though and try to have a backup plan of other family or friends near by to help out and pick up or watch sick kids.

I’ve heard great things about elderberry to help lessen sickness but unfortunately I can’t give it a solid two thumbs up quite yet. We only started using it the last month of school and I couldn’t tell if it was really making much of a difference.

Truly makes me thankful for summer break! This has been the longest we’ve gone with out running noses, coughs and other nasties. Phew!

9. Be selective with what to keep

In the beginning, it’s going to be so temping to want to save every little piece of school work that comes home. I know it was for me at least.

Soon enough, my daughter came to expect me to save just about everything. I mean, how could I let her see me throw away something she worked on?

Let me just tell you, they send home everything. And I mean everything. A piece of paper with a single stick drawing? Send it home! The 70th worksheet counting to 100? Send it home! I’m not kidding, they send it all home.

Be “picky” with what you keep. Let your little one know from the get-go that you simply can’t keep everything they bring home but will cherish what you do keep. A great idea I’ve heard is to take photos of their work that’s still cute but not necessarily something you feel the need to keep.

Another fun idea is to consider giving your child an artwork display for their room. This way they can keep whatever papers they want to enjoy for a bit. Once the artwork display is full, they’ll need to get rid of a piece of work to be able to add in their newest work.

Picture Hanging Kit Set

10. It’s the small things that make a difference

This is exactly what SchoolRunMessyBun is all about!

There are a million and one ways to make this year truly the best year ever. Keep school fun and exciting by celebrating all the little things. Make the first day fun by starting back to school traditions. Celebrate their birthday by drawing all over the car for school drop off and pick up. Make fun holiday themed lunches!

There are endless ways to celebrate all the small things. If you ever need any ideas or inspiration how to your little ones day great, you can always turn to us!

11. They’ll learn about things.. even stuff you’re not ready for

Get ready… to not to be ready!

Kids love to share and repeat information! Even just share experiences. Playground talk can get kind of crazy!

I’ll just say from my own experience as a child, I was super guilty of this! A simple question about my birth turned into a very basic but still true explanation of the birds and the bees. This was wild news to me and apparently I had to share with my friends the next day. Yup! I bet there were some not-so-happy parents that day.. Yikes.

I think this one also goes hand in hand with being more mindful of what you talk about around them because ALL of it is being reported to the teacher and their little friends lol

12. Their personality will change

You’ll say goodbye to your little baby on that first day and by the end of year they’ll be a whole new person!

I think Kindergarten was my daughters biggest year of growth yet. It was insane! One day, a few months into school, I looked at her was like ?? who even are you!? She seemed so big and just.. different. She wasn’t super little anymore, her voice had changed a bit.. less baby-ish. She would talk about school “drama” as if it was her favorite TV show, etc.

You’ll be talking to your kiddo one day and it’ll just hit you. They’re different. They’re truly out there growing and learning, experiencing things and making memories that you’ll never know about. Things that you’ll never experience with them. They’re really becoming their own person.. not even becoming but already are! It’s absolutely wild!

13. Take lots of pictures

You’ll be picture crazy on the first day of school but then slowly as you get into the routine of everyday life there won’t be as many photos.

I encourage you to take tons! Be obnoxious with the amount you take. Looking back, some of my favorite photos are ones I took on just normal days. Photos of all three of my kids lined up walking side by side in the early morning to take their sister to the bus. I can almost feel the crisp morning air just looking at those photos.

One thing I’m really glad I did was purchase an instant camera! I’m terrible about printing photos and let’s be honest, do you still have photos from 7+ years ago on your phone? How far back does your camera roll go? What happened to all of those photos?

While not insanely great quality, there’s something kinda charming about the somewhat blurry, overexposed photos I get from my Instax Mini. Having tangible photos is something I absolutely love! Plus, we decided to make a “yearbook” of sorts of our own. It includes report cards, paperwork, artwork, photos, little keepsakes. Think yearbook meets junk journal! It’s pretty neat and super special to us.

14. The year will go by so fast

The last thing I wish I know before my child started kindergarten was that dang, Kindergarten absolutely flies by!

The first week of school suddenly rolls into a crazy busy holiday season which turns into spring break and then suddenly you’re getting papers about Kindergarten graduation!

It’s not fair how fast it goes by but it’s something to be mindful of! The hustle and bustle of everyday life sets in and we forget to enjoy the little things. The early bus stop pick ups, the rush of getting everyone out the door on time in the morning, the days we almost forget to pack a lunch, etc. all get in the way and cloud our minds.

Remember to slow down every now and then. Leave your phone at home on that morning walk to the bus stop, pack a really sweet and heartfelt lunch on a Friday just because and study those little drawings they bring home.

When Kindergarten graduation comes around and you’re looking at your at your not-so-little-anymore baby up there singing a song and getting their colorful diploma you’ll think back to the first day. You’ll realize how quick the year went. Don’t have any regrets. Be in the moment because before you know it, you’ll blink and they’ll be up there on a much bigger stage graduating high school.

Take it all in because it goes by so dang fast!